Our task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the
barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
-Rumi
You know something is important when you keep encountering it in every
book you read!
Over the past month, I’ve been surprised (and not) at how in almost every
book I’ve read, the topic of self-compassion arises as an important skill to
possess.
Here are a few examples:
Indistractable by Nir Eyal
The Top Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware
Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily and Amelia
Nagoski
The Confidence Code by Katty Kay & Claire Shipman
Yes, to be fair these all would fall in the self-help section of the library, but
across the board every single one of them mentions the importance of
self-compassion.
Whether you are growing confidence, increasing your ability to focus,
handling stress more productively, or living a life without regrets self-
compasion is a crucial element!
Over the years I’ve started a collection all the good things that come with
practicing self-compassion. Some of these are personal changes and
other are well researched benefits that I can also attest to experiencing in
my own life and witnessing in the lives of my clients.
Here are some of them:
Greater levels of confidence and positive mood
Increased motivation for positive changes (ie: eating healthy,
exercising, managing time)
Ability to stick with changes for longer
Improved relationships (with partners, children, friends)
Greater resilience (your ability to handle challenging situations with
grace and recover more quickly)
Willingness to try new things and embrace change
Decreased anxiety, depression, and stress
Who wouldn’t want this?
And yet, it becomes one of those vague things that we say we “should do”.
“Oh yeah, I really should be kinder to myself. I know it’s good for me, but….”
I think this happens for a couple reasons:
- Being kind to yourself is vague. What does it mean? How do we do it?
What does it actually take to grow this skill? - It’s hard. We’ve been conditioned to do the exact opposite and so it
feels weird, awkward, and new. - We turn it into another “thing” to do on our endless list. Nothing feels
easy or fun as an obligation. - It’s scary. Our negative habits and inner critical voice have been
there for so long and are tightly interwoven into how we motivate
ourselves. We are genuinely afraid that if we no longer have them we
will end up on the couch, covered in potato chips and/or icecream,
and watching Netflix without restraint
I’ve struggled with ALL of these over the past 10 years as I’ve learned to be
kinder to myself.
But I don’t any longer!
Today I have a consistent self-compassion practice and encourage
myself the way that my best friends do. And while my life isn’t perfect, I do
experience daily all the lovely benefits I listed above!
The number one thing that got me out of the fears and excuses to a place
of practicing self-compassion (and experiencing all the wonderful
benefits) wasn’t information, or an amazing book (which I read plenty of!).
The thing that really changed me for good was having a concrete plan
with actionable steps as well as the personalized support to make it
happen.
I honestly wouldn’t be where I am today without my mentors and teachers
and the structured process they offered.
Information is great but without commitment and consistent action no
one ends up where they want to be.
This is why I created my course: Become Your own Best Friend: Tame Your
Inner Critic and Awaken Your Authentic Self. I wanted to share the
blueprint that I used to transform my own self-doubt and sabotage into
confidence and self-trust and deliver it in a way that got lasting results in
less time.
I spent over 10 years trying to learn how to be kinder to myself. I’d love to
save you the stress and time and show you how to do in in under 10 weeks.
So if you are:
weary and burned out on caring for others in a big way
anxious and tired from the constant negative chatter in your mind
stuck in a cycle of setting big goals and never fulfilling them and then
feeling like a constant failure
fed up with being hard on yourself and seeking validation from
others
And ready to be:
comfortable in your own skin and deeply grounded in your own
knowing
energized by life and your purpose
successful in what you set out to do, knowing that you have the
strength to learn from mistakes and keep moving forward
a steady source of love and support for yourself
Then please check out my course below.
Life inherently holds so much hardship, let’s not add to the pain by being
hard on ourselves as well!
❤
Jennifer
*Do you know a woman who might be interested in this class? Please
forward this email onto them. The world needs all of us at our best and
that means being kind to ourselves! Let’s start a “LOVEVOLUTION”! *
;)❤❤❤ 😉